In an unprecedented and rather surprising move both the parties involved in the Ayodhya land dispute case have agreed for reconciliation. Respecting Allahabad high court’s plea for an amicable solution of the issue, representatives of both the groups had a meeting in which it was decided that the controversial piece of land will be used for the construction of an All India Institute of Terrorism. Members of RSS, VHP, Bajrang Dal ,Akhil Bharatiya Vidyarthi Parishad (ABVP)and Indian Mujahidin were major supporters of this move. One of the members of the Hindu wing, who looked more saffron than brown, thanks to his saffron dhoti, saffron tilak, saffron kurta, went to say “we are very happy over this development. After all this is the only common ground we could find.”
The Indian youth was actually going gung ho over this decision. And why not, terrorism after all is the single largest employment provider in the world today. So, all these illiterate poor guys who had nothing much to do, save remain hungry and unemployed will now be taken in to knock off some innocent looking people. One of the aspirants for the AIIT (All India Institute of Terrorism) told the media.”I was earlier trying for the police force. But then I realized that AIIT is a much better option. Here you get much better weapons than the police without the botheration of a license. And if you perform well you have good chances of going to ‘phoren’, and work in luxury building s like WTC or the Taj hotel. They also fuckin pay better.”
The only person who was not happy over this development was Mr. SAS Geelani who bluntly remarked-” Why is there no such institute in Kashmir. Kashmir valley has been under terrorism and insurgency for 6 decades yet Ayodhya gets to be the place where this institute will come up. That is why I prefer Pakistan. Millions of Kashmiris are unemployed today. Had Kashmir been in Pakistan, they would have all joined ISI and dispatched to Afghanistan to bomb Karzai’s Govt. off and kill Indian contractors.”Omar Abdullah was also dissatisfied with the AIIT not being in Kashmir and as usual, blamed Indian Army for that.
But this plan had its own set of hiccups, the biggest of them being Suresh Kalmadi. Apparently Mr. Kalmadi had proposed Ayodhya to be the venue for the Olympics, if he won the bid to host the 2016 Olympics. Skeptics were terrified that if Kalmadi won the bid (which he was actually good at) and started building stadia then many more buildings would collapse after Babri ,and this time not many people will be needed to bring the structures down. So, the stakeholders of did a Putin, and banned Kalmadi from interfering in Ayodhya issue on legal grounds.(those interested in knowing how this was done may contact Vladimir Putin who kicked Mikhail Kashyanov out of elections on legal grounds so that his ally Dmitri Medvedev could easily become the President of Russia.)
L.K. Advani echoed the sentiments of the country and said that this was a welcome step and further clarified that it had nothing to do with Uma Bharti’s return to BJP. He said that it would help us strengthen our relationship with our neighbours,China and Pakistan who would then become the two largest investors in this area.
RSS chief Mohan Rao Bhagwat was candid in his approach.He said “earlier we were highly dissatisfied with Mr. Chidambaram’s ‘Saffron Terror’ comments.We have been involved every major effort from Babri to Godhra yet this man gets to do the nomenclature. But this institute is a welcome move. Now we can work officially with lesser legal hiccups.”
(Ayodhya may not have shown us Ram but it has definitely given us lot many Ravans.Lets see how the 30th September verdict changes Ayodhya and India as a whole.)