Indian parents like Indian filmmakers, politicians and scientists lack originality and stuck to stereotype. Mine wanted me to study engineering. And I had to comply. However I had no idea that some 15, 93,763 odd dumbfucks also wanted to study engineering. The result was obvious. I didn’t get into the IITs, or the NITs, or the VIT or RV College or MS Ramiah or KIIT or Silicon or ITER or…………….OK STOP. The list is pretty long. My parents didn’t know what to do with my AIEEE rank which was also the population of Sikkim. The reasons of my failure were - only 4896 seats in the IITs(hell,the tent house near my house has more number of seats),Late Mr. V P Singh’s political ambitions(the motherfucker introduced quota),tuition teachers who mugged up H C Verma at night and vomited in front of us,Arihant books which were so costly I didn’t bother to buy them and of course my interest in college girls being a little more than the college books.
Amazingly after you have been rejected from each and every elite institution of the country you get a lot of choices in colleges. It is then pretty much like shopping for china made handsets. Looking at those colleges you can be sure that these colleges must have been designed by the students of those very colleges. There is therefore a cone shaped college, a pyramid shaped college, a cylinder shaped, and a brick shaped one and even some that roughly looked like male and female sex organs. Apparently the architects concerned had taken full liberty in molesting the college and the noble Euclidian Geometry with structural designs that wouldn’t have got approval even in Somalia. If there structures weren’t enough torture there was the names. Lovely, Maharaja, Black Diamond, Queen aren’t the names of Red Light areas around. They are the names engineering colleges. And the gals and guys studying there aren’t prostitutes and pimps though most of them might make you feel otherwise. Anyways I and my parents looked around for colleges that would be interested in taking me in. After much hassle a generous college was kind enough to grant me admission. My college, Krupajal, which by its name sounded more like Swami Nityanand ‘s ashram looked like BMC office in dire need of repair. It wasn’t exactly a “bhaiyaa ji smile” moment for me looking at my college. Nor did it help when my lecturers dictated notes in English only MLA’S of Bihar can relate to. But hell, fuck with it. My college and its cartoons require a 465 page novel on it which I am not interested in writing. Besides, I am not Chetan Bhagat who believes its cool banging your wife before marriage and the world deserves to know about it. The focus of this article is about private engineering colleges in my city and its students. Idiots from different spectrums of society gather in these colleges hoping that their nonexistent career and single digit marks will find some respect here.
Students here can be divided into 2 broad categories. Boys and girls. (Other categories like gays, lesbians, transsexuals, cross dressers haven’t revealed themselves in public yet.) Local girls hailing from places such as Kalahandi, Bolangir behave as if they are from Southampton or California. Girls from Bihar behave like they are from Bihar. Then there are the guys. Three days into porn and they start believing that they are the most sophisticated guys on the plant. Wearing fake branded t shirts and embroidered jeans they roam around in second hand mopeds behaving like they deserve a hot girlfriend and a good fuck. Reality being tier -3 engineering students are like Nepali watchmen. People watch them but don’t take them seriously neither their job.
Indian education system which hasn’t been taken seriously since Mountbatten died and Kapil Sibal’s deliberate experiments with education laws so that he can sit with Nidhi Razdan and explain why he fucked it up in the first place has left the engineering students and student fraternity of other fields well fucked with a curriculum that would make any decent educationist say” had you taken hashish when you were writing the syllabus. “Any ways after completing their degree the students from Orissa, Bihar go to Mumbai and likewise places to get thrashed by saffron wearing unemployed counterparts. Moral of the story is whether or not TCS has employed you as a part of its corporate social responsibility scheme, your average Joe life as well as mine sucks .Like it or not, we are all going to join the aam admi brigade.aam admi-the ones who cry each time onion price rises.
And finally…………………………………
No Google doesn’t visit my campus. No we are not a deemed university. My college didn’t have enough money to bribe the UGC guys. No I still do not know the name of the chick who performed on star nite and yes her cleavage was visible.69% of the students of my university are still unemployed and yes engineering sucks.
DISCLAIMER:-The writer doesn’t intended to offend any community, caste ,religion or profession. All other shit that is displayed before a controversial movie is shown, is also included here. Besides a gentleman is one who can take a joke on him and not sulk……….or suck.
