At about 9:30 pm yesterday after stealing pictures from Facebook profiles of college hotties who don’t give a shit about me, I started thinking about my nation’s future, corruption, terrorism, P. Chidambaram and Katrina Kaif. While thinking, I suddenly realized that corruption or terrorism weren’t India’s greatest threats. Or for that matters nor were swami Nityanand or Mayawati.(No No its not Pakistan, for a change)if years of corruption, terrorism, naxalism and congress weren’t enough the nation was and is being plagued by a category of harmless looking yet dangerous group of people; people bearing the name ‘RAHUL’. Though initially the brain child and probably the only original thing ever by Karan Johar(remember SRK in kuch kuch hota hai,k3g, etc ,etc……oh my god how many etcs………)this name has gone on to become the emblem of terror. I give you a few examples to justify my conclusion.
RAHUL ROY: Those who can’t recognize this name cannot be blamed, for the only people who can recall this name today are probably the person himself and his parents. Poor parents, they don’t have a choice, do they?Some thousands of years ago, in a different era, this guy was actually famous. From beetle shops to marriage parties, from auto rickshaws to town buses where ever I went, whichever mode of transport I took, the songs of this guy’s movies played nonstop. They were pure torture to genuine music lovers. It was like living in Auschwitz camps. The music was original copy work of Nadeem Shravan pirated straight 4m Pakistan. Zia ul Haq prodigies were planning a nuke attack for this but then the Chinese intelligence informed them that Indians are basically copycats .Everything from their movie scripts to their constitution is copied. They just can’t help copying. Hence, the Pakistanis cancelled their mission. Anyways Mr. Rahul disappeared 4m the face of the earth eventually saving us the torture.
RAHUL BHATT: relatively unknown son of an unknown director, Mahesh Bhatt (the man who owes his success to Quentin Tarantino’s movie DVDs) came to lime light when his affair with David Headly was made public. If being Mahesh Bhatt’s son wasn’t enough disgrace rahul joined big boss. His achievements include dating Headly and chance maaroing on Pakistani cricketer’s ex-girlfriend.(common dude, raise your standard)but his biggest achievement was his jokes which never cracked and made big boss suck more than it should have.
RAHUL MAHAJAN: The real inspiration behind Akshay Kumar’s laugh in a mobile commercial Rahul married a girl on TV. Pity he didn’t have his honeymoon there. Anyways besides ………………………..uhmmmmmmmmmm ……..well…………ok this guy didn’t do anything else save marrying ,whacking his wife ,get divorced and marrying again, and……………………..
RAHUL GANDHI :as smart as Sarah Palin, as handsome as Dino Morea, the true representative of youth in India(when the media made the statement of Rahul being the true representative of youth, which youth were they taking into account, the ones roaming in saalia saahi or what!!)Dropped twice from 2 prestigious universities and the guaranteed future P.M of the nation ,Rahul Gandhi has shown us the true ideology of modern India, that No matter how dumb you are if your dad is rich ,powerful and corrupt you will never fall.
(MORAL OR THE STORY: RAHULs ARE DANGEROUS AND IN SOME CASES PURE NUTS. SO STAY ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
RAHUL ROY: Those who can’t recognize this name cannot be blamed, for the only people who can recall this name today are probably the person himself and his parents. Poor parents, they don’t have a choice, do they?Some thousands of years ago, in a different era, this guy was actually famous. From beetle shops to marriage parties, from auto rickshaws to town buses where ever I went, whichever mode of transport I took, the songs of this guy’s movies played nonstop. They were pure torture to genuine music lovers. It was like living in Auschwitz camps. The music was original copy work of Nadeem Shravan pirated straight 4m Pakistan. Zia ul Haq prodigies were planning a nuke attack for this but then the Chinese intelligence informed them that Indians are basically copycats .Everything from their movie scripts to their constitution is copied. They just can’t help copying. Hence, the Pakistanis cancelled their mission. Anyways Mr. Rahul disappeared 4m the face of the earth eventually saving us the torture.
RAHUL BHATT: relatively unknown son of an unknown director, Mahesh Bhatt (the man who owes his success to Quentin Tarantino’s movie DVDs) came to lime light when his affair with David Headly was made public. If being Mahesh Bhatt’s son wasn’t enough disgrace rahul joined big boss. His achievements include dating Headly and chance maaroing on Pakistani cricketer’s ex-girlfriend.(common dude, raise your standard)but his biggest achievement was his jokes which never cracked and made big boss suck more than it should have.
RAHUL MAHAJAN: The real inspiration behind Akshay Kumar’s laugh in a mobile commercial Rahul married a girl on TV. Pity he didn’t have his honeymoon there. Anyways besides ………………………..uhmmmmmmmmmm ……..well…………ok this guy didn’t do anything else save marrying ,whacking his wife ,get divorced and marrying again, and……………………..
RAHUL GANDHI :as smart as Sarah Palin, as handsome as Dino Morea, the true representative of youth in India(when the media made the statement of Rahul being the true representative of youth, which youth were they taking into account, the ones roaming in saalia saahi or what!!)Dropped twice from 2 prestigious universities and the guaranteed future P.M of the nation ,Rahul Gandhi has shown us the true ideology of modern India, that No matter how dumb you are if your dad is rich ,powerful and corrupt you will never fall.
(MORAL OR THE STORY: RAHULs ARE DANGEROUS AND IN SOME CASES PURE NUTS. SO STAY ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
HAHA
ReplyDeleteSUPER FUNNY man..
Hats Off to your observation and I am a bit jealous too cuz this never clicked my brain.
RAHUL is a new generation threat for sure :D
I was also expecting Rahul Bose & Dev's story ;)
i liked it a lot.but sanga ur remarks on mr. mahesh bhatt and nadeem shravan is absolutely wrong.mr bhatt is one of the most famous directors who is not only famous for acclaimed movies like arth,saraansh,naam,zakhm.....,but also one of the very few people concerned 4 d trade.his son is a good for nothing though.mr. bhatt has number of national awards and he was one of the few people starting the art cinema movement in india.but overall a great work by u dear.enjoyed it thoroughly.keep it on
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